A special visit from Memere

Today Eric's mom left after a week-long visit.  Her visit was my Christmas present- when she was asking me what I wanted for Christmas, I told her I didn't want her to buy me anything, I don't need any more "stuff," but what I really wanted was her time and her organized brain to help me clean and organize my house.  She spent a week here and gave me a priceless Christmas present!

In her week here, she:

• Painted our family room and kitchen (with Eric's help).  This included all our trim work and the 3 doors we had installed when our kitchen was renovated 2 years ago. For 2 years I had unpainted trim and doors and I just stopped noticing it.
• Painted a wall of our living room.
• Rearranged our living room and dining room furniture to be functional and more attractive.
• Selected places to hang our art, and then hung some of it.
• Went with me to Homegoods and made me choose a duvet cover and pillow to decorate my room. I haven't purchased or received a new duvet cover since Eric and I married almost 10 years ago.  I also bought a picture to hang in Charlotte's room, which hasn't had a single thing hung in there for the entirety of her life.  Then she hung the picture while I went to work.
• Decorated the boys' room, including buying comforter and sheet sets. In the 3 years we have lived here, I have hung nothing on their walls. In the 18 months since they have been sleeping in their bunk bed, I never bought them a comforter.  Now they have a decorated room that looks and feels much more like home.
• Organized Charlotte's and the boys' drawers; pulled the baby items I had been hiding in the back of the boys' closet out and made me deal with them.
• Pulled all the random toiletries I had been piling in my bathroom out and made me sort them, then put the ones I kept back in the bathroom in an organized way.
• Re-organized my pantry.
• Moved our appliances in the kitchen so our counters look clearer and we have more usable counter space.
• Hung blinds and valances.
• Decluttered all our surfaces.
• Did at least 7 loads of laundry.
• Swept and vacuumed. Eric joked that our cleaning lady will have nothing to do when she comes on Tuesday!
• Made lasagna while I worked all day.
• Babysat the kids while Eric and I went out to dinner with friends.

I am willing to bet that she did more than that and that I'm leaving some things out, but I think that list gives a good idea of how helpful she was.  The week flew by (at least it did for me, she may have been counting the minutes to getting home and getting some rest) and we were all sad to see her go today.

There were tears when we dropped her at the airport, and tonight when I tucked Asher into bed he said, "Mommy, I want something." I said, "what do you want?" and he said, "I want Memere back."  The kids loved having all the time with and attention from Memere, and it made a difference to have another adult in the house.

Now that Memere is retired, I have many ideas as to how she can spend her time. I told her she has to come back again so we can have a trip just to play, with days in the city and seeing a show, a trip out to Lancaster, and leisure time.  I also suggested that they join us for the weekend when we go to DC to celebrate the boys' birthday.  It did make me wish that Eric's parents lived closer to us so that the kids could spend more time with them- it is hard when we are far away and it takes so long to get from one place to another.  

I got the best Christmas gift ever, and I am enjoying my clean, grown-up looking house. It is finally beginning to feel like a home, and not just a place where we are stashing our belongings.  We still have a few more things to do, but when the sun is shining again, I will take some pictures of her hard work and post them.

Benjamin

We are in the midst of a decorative overhaul here- courtesy of Eric's mom. She flew down from Maine and is spending the week helping me purge my collected garbage, clean, and decorate. Three years in this house and I haven't decorated anything at all, so sometime soon we will have a house that vaguely resembles a grown-up's, and not a college kid's.

This post, though, is about my sweet boy Benjamin.  I am just so impressed with him and his interest in trying new things, and adapting... while still being his out-to-lunch self.

This morning, he had a hard time getting ready for school- 10 minutes after I asked him to get dressed, he was sitting in his underwear, and when I asked him to GET DRESSED, he started to take his underwear off!  Then we were running late and I asked him to get on his coat and shoes- which he did, but forgot his backpack.  I was so out to lunch that I didn't even notice he didn't have it when I walked him to school, and he and I were both surprised when he came home from school without a backpack. What a pair we make!

Today Benjamin had his first day of basketball at the JCC.  Originally, Asher had asked to play basketball this winter.  As sign-up time near, Asher changed his mind- but Benjamin said he still wanted to do it.  So today I took Benjamin, by himself, to his first basketball class.  This is the 3rd class he has taken by himself after Asher pooped out. First it was gymnastics, then art, and now basketball. I love that he tries these things by himself, and enjoys them.

Benjamin is also an adventurous eater, and likes to try new and unfamiliar foods.  He likes all kinds of ethnic foods, and Eric and I both get a great deal of pleasure from watching him eat and enjoy food. I told Benjamin I would take him out for a Japanese lunch someday, which he was excited about. I am pretty sure that without his brother and sister's negative influence, he will try and like sushi.

A case of goofball-itis

Benjamin is our consistent and predictable child.  He is empathic and kind, sweet and silly.  He's not reading independently yet, but he loves being read to, and we have spent time together snuggled on the couch reading some good books.  Right now we are in the middle of "Hello, Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle" and yet another Magic Treehouse book.

Today I am feeling especially close to, and in love with, my sweet boy. I wanted to take time to write about it so that I will remember these special moments with him.

Christmas 2015

We are back from what felt like a very short visit to Maine for Christmas with Eric's family.  We left on Wednesday evening, the 23rd, and drove up from 6:30 pm until 1:30 am on Christmas Eve. Eric drove the whole way, carefully, in the pouring rain.  I made a big deal out of saying, "Don't wake me in the morning, I'm sleeping in until 10!" But when the clock hit 7:30, I was awake just like any other day.

We had lazy days where the kids stayed in pajamas and played with toys and watched TV. On Christmas Eve, I forced myself to go out and jog 4 miles, and then I came home and took a nap!  Christmas Eve evening we went to Eric's grandparents for dinner and a visit from Santa.

Me with Asher in an elf hat

The kids were pretty excited to see Santa and see what presents he had brought.   Asher had drawn him a picture of Asher and Santa, which he was eager to give.

Charlotte gave Santa a hug

 My sweet children consumed endless amounts of candy while refusing all nutritious food.  And of course we let them eat it.  Then we went home for a late bedtime and to wait for Santa's big visit.

On Christmas morning, the kids opened their stockings and the gifts from Eric's grandparents.  They each got a Beanie baby which they loved, and carted around from that moment on. Asher got a cat named "Freckles," Benjamin a panda named "Bamboo," and Charlotte a cat that she calls "Becca Kitty," but also calls a "he." I am both honored to be her toy's namesake and worried that she thinks I am a boy.

Look of excitement over the Beanie baby 

Mommy, Benjamin, Bamboo

We then cooked a big breakfast, and then the kids played some more. Eventually we made it out to a playground, because it was almost 60 degrees and sunny. On Christmas Day. In Maine. So there we were, playing outside at the playground with no coats on!

 After that, the kids took good naps to get ready for their cousins' arrival that night.  When they came over, we had a big dinner and then opened the gifts Eric's parents had bought. Each kid had 7 wrapped gifts, and they opened them one at a time and we all took a moment to see what people were opening.  My poor mother-in-law has 9 grandchildren she buys for!

Eric's brother and his wife have 6 kids, the youngest is just 1 month old.  I got the special treat of holding her- and I can tell you that my desire to have another baby has not gone away. In the moments where I want to sit on my kids just to make them do what I want, I think maybe another wouldn't be such a great idea. But holding a tiny, warm newborn baby against my chest and listening to her breathe... I want my own!

At the end of gift opening, one of our nephews got sick and vomited. I did not keep my cool. I am a total vomit-phobe and the idea of my kids getting a stomach bug makes me completely anxious. Beyond anxious. Charlotte was between my nephew and the door and I yelled, "Charlotte! Get out of the way!" and definitely sent her into a panic. Not cool, Mom, not cool.  Then my niece Myah told me that she had been throwing up that morning. Oh, great!  Fortunately we are now 72 hours out from the vomit incident with no problems here, so I am hoping we escaped.

The next day I needed to get out of the house. Eric and his dad planned a woodworking project (new and improved organization coming soon!), so I was on my own. The kids were tired and a little nuts, and I took them to the children's museum in Dover, NH. It is a great little museum, and the kids were at just the right age for a lot of the exhibits and play. We played for a couple of hours, and then went out to lunch, and then came back.

Charlotte driving the submarine 

Benjamin talking on the phone in the pretend post office

We had visited the museum once before, in August 2013, and I took this picture of Charlotte:

Charlotte, 8 months old

On this visit, I took this picture:

She is holding up 3 fingers on each hand because she is now 3 years old

My BABY! She is so big! My mom also commented that we thought she was a cutie then, but now she is even more beautiful.

We went to lunch at a pizza place up the street, it was delicious and we were all starving.

Watching the men make pizza

A man watched me take the above picture and then commented, "Now you have photographic evidence that you are super mom!" I don't think of my taking my 3 kids out as such a feat, but maybe not all parents do it. After more play, we went back to Eric's parents' and tried more naps.  Charlotte was a total pain and managed to keep Benjamin from napping, so they dragged around like zombies the rest of the day.

Eric and his dad went to see Star Wars that night, so I thought the no-naps would work in my favor in getting Charlotte and Benjamin to sleep.  No such luck. Charlotte continued to be a total pain and kept getting out of her pack n play to jump on her brothers in bed. At 9:10, when she was still up, I decided to move her pack n play into the closet that is off of the bedroom Eric and I share (she has slept in there previous visits but had said she wanted to be with her brothers this time). She acted like she had won the lottery, smiling and giggling. As I set up her pack n play in the closet with a refrigerator and shelves full of my mother-in-law's appliances, she clasped her hands and said, "Oooh, I LOVE it! It's SO booot-iful in here!"  Oh my god. That girl. In the meantime, her brothers were happily hauling her crap (blankets, pillow, stuffed animals) into the closet, thrilled to be rid of her. After that, everyone went to sleep, and Pat and I were able to finish watching "Coming to America" in peace.

On Sunday we went up to Freeport to visit my cousins, who took us to their Y, where we went candle-pin bowling and swimming. What a treat! Charlotte ended up getting a pretty good score, even though she could barely throw the ball down the alley and it would just kind of drift.  Then we spent an hour swimming in the warm, indoor pool- such a treat for a cold and rainy day in December!

Asher keeping score

After our busy morning, all of the kids did nap. On Sunday evening we celebrated Charlotte and Chandler's birthdays (Chandler is 1 year and 6 days younger than Charlotte) with pizza and cupcakes. There were more gifts for Charlotte- the little pumpkin is spoiled!

On Monday we went out to breakfast with Eric's parents, and then we had planned to go volunteer at the nursing home in town, but the kids were not in great shape, and Eric was eager to get home.  So off we went, and spent all day in the car.  We got home in time for dinner, where my parents and Jane and Ed met us with a big dinner.

We've now spent all week ignoring our usual schedule and semi-healthy eating habits.  I went to work on Tuesday and enjoyed the break!  Last night we hosted New Years Eve, which was lovely. And the New Year deserves its own post, but this year we had a very merry and joyful Christmas. I don't know how the kids will wait another year for it to come again.

Charlotte Eve: THREE years old!

School picture, cropped to avoid showing her underwear!

Happy 3rd birthday to my joy, my sweetness, my only baby girl!  She is THREE!  I spent some time reminiscing with her about the day she was born, and showed her some pictures of her right after her arrival- I am not sure she has really put it together that it's her.  But it feels like just yesterday, and it is still hard to believe that I will never have another baby.

Today we went to the pediatrician for her 3 year well visit.  She is measuring:
33.6 lbs (75th percentile)
37.5" (about 50th percentile)
The doctor seemed to think that her height was off, since her last height was taken lying down and this height was taken standing.  I'm inclined to agree, since things have definitely gotten shorter on her in the past few months, and she looks thinner to me than she did before.  The doctor said she is perfect, healthy, and thriving.

Birthday girl wore her birthday suit to birthday breakfast

Cupcake at school

My Charlotte continues to be precocious, funny, silly, and sweet.  She has started to call me "Mama" sometimes, which I just love.  She knows her alphabet and recognizes many of the letters. She can count to about 13 and can sometimes count accurately (sometimes things get counted twice, sometimes not at all...).  She knows almost every song she has heard and sings them to me.  The other day we were in the car and Drake's "Hotline Bling" came on the radio and it started, "you used to call me on my..." and she piped up from the back seat: "Cell phone!"

Paw Patrol shirt, Hello Kitty necklace, fairy wings, wand.

She takes dance once a week, and always looks forward to it.  She doesn't dance or sing on command (what 3 year old does), but she is adorable when you catch her doing it.  She loves her kitty cats, and continues to "adopt" more and more cats to sleep with at night.  Charlotte keeps Black-and-white Kitty and White Kitty with her all the time, and now "Charlotte Kitty" (an orange cat she got for Hanukkah) has to come in bed at night, too.  She sucks her thumb when she is in bed, or tired, or feeling shy.  Her love of cats extends to books- she loves the book "Naughty Kitty," and when I had to return it to the library, I bought Charlotte her own copy.  Then she loved the book "Kitten for a Day," which I also had to return to the library.  She loves to watch TV- too much.  She gets obsessed with shoes and will watch them endlessly, and beg me to watch TV "just for a little bit!" We use the TV to bribe, but there are often tantrums when the TV goes off.

Oh, the tantrums.  Charlotte could be worse; she is definitely able to be redirected, or at times amenable if she's given a choice of one thing or another.  But she is definitely strong-willed and opinionated.  I do admire that in her- I don't want a pushover for a daughter.  She is lucky, because she is cute, and people often give her what she wants without a fight.

A rainbow heart cake, at Charlotte's request

My baby who once ate everything I handed her is now picky- she falls somewhere between Benjamin and Asher in pickiness.  She really dislikes most meat, or says she does- she avoids it on her plate, but if we convince her to take a bite she then says, "Yummy!"  She eats eggs, pancakes, French toast, waffles, oatmeal, and cold cereal for breakfast.  She loves fruits and will often ask for fruit for snack or in her lunch.  She loves yogurt, all kinds of cheeses, crackers and pretzels, and hummus.  For lunch she generally prefers a collection of snack foods to a real meal.  And at dinner- pasta, pasta, pasta!  She also likes mashed potatoes, many vegetables, fish sticks, hot dogs, dumplings, and meatballs.  She is easily distracted and will hop up from the table if one of her brothers gets up first, even if she isn't done eating.  And like Asher, she has a great sweet tooth, and loves cookies.

Charlotte is agile, and fast. She runs with great coordination- and loves to race. Every time we want her to do something she seems reluctant to do (go to the potty when she hasn't gone in a while), we tell her we will race her and we will win! Then she gets going. But if we get too far ahead and make it impossible for her to "win," she will throw herself down on the floor and scream, which is the opposite of what we were hoping to achieve.

She has recently started to fight about nap and protest her nap time.  She still really needs her nap, and is a total crab without it, so I'm not eager to have her stop, but fighting her on it is pretty painful.  She sleeps well at nighttime, thank goodness, but I need that break from kids in the afternoon!  Asher still naps predictably, and he is almost 6!

We had a birthday party for her yesterday, which was not the success I had hoped, but I don't want to go into the painful details here. Charlotte said she had fun, which is what I do hope for in the end.  Here are some pictures:

I love my girl, I have loved having another year of fun and happiness with her.  She is sweet and delicious, and I cannot get enough of her. I am excited for what this coming year will hold, and so proud of her.  She is a joy to be around, a charismatic and lovable girl, to whom everyone is drawn.  She is three, and I still cannot believe how lucky I am to have her in my life.  She is the perfect last child, the final piece to the puzzle that makes our family.  

December so far

I don't like that I haven't had time to do an in-depth post, to talk about all the wonderful things that happen here- but we have been BUSY.  Here are some photos of our past 2 weeks:

The first weekend in December, I took all 3 kids, by myself, into the city to see the light shows.  We started at Macy's. They have an old-fashioned light show and some organ music.  It was short and sweet. I had thought we would go see the "Dickens Christmas Village" but the line was 45 minutes long, through the lingerie department, with the 3 kids making trouble... so we left.  Whew!

Waiting for the light show. The boys were picking jewelry and watches for themselves

 Next stop, the Comcast Center. They had a very cool show with lots of fun holiday songs, and snow machines dropping snow on us- possibly the only snow we will see this winter!

Charlotte and kitty enjoying the show

For the first time in my adult life, I felt nervous about being in a crowded public place in the city.  I am not afraid of crowds, but all the recent news of mass shooting and the terror attacks in Paris nagged at the back of my head.  I made sure we were standing in a place I could easily get us out. I hate that I was thinking that way; I hate that I would have to think that way.

We went from there to the Christmas Village, which has stalls set up selling holiday goods, plus food, plus hot chocolate.  The kids got soft pretzels, and we picked out an ornament for Memere for Christmas.

Serious young men 

Charlotte is being held up by some random woman who offered to help me out

 We wanted to stay out of the house longer, since Eric was working with friends on our basement.  So even though the kids were getting tired (the boys walked about 3 miles with me!), we went out to lunch at Panera.  The weather was so warm that we were able to eat outside!  Everything was going great:

Until they just fell apart. Benjamin was hanging over the chair saying he didn't feel well, his tummy hurt, and he wanted to go home and take a nap.  I totally panicked, thinking he might have a tummy bug and start vomiting, so we hit the road fast and I made Eric rush home from his lunch break to help get the kids in bed. Benjamin went right to sleep, slept about 3 hours, and woke up totally fine.  I guess I just wore him out with all that walking.

That night, we had a dinner with my grad school friends and their offspring. 7 families: 14 adults, 14 kids (and 2 more on the way). It is total madness!  My friend took this picture:

 Our friends have an exercise room in their basement and I guess the kids were working off their dinner!  Benjamin is in the foreground wearing a safety vest and a yellow helmet.  This picture cracks me up!

Sunday, daddy was still working, so the kids and I went shopping for the "angel" we adopted from an angel tree at a YMCA.  We went first to Kohl's, where Asher struggled to understand that we could shop and not buy a single thing for him.  Our angel was a 5 year old girl, and her wishlist was: clothes, sneakers, snow boots, a winter coat.  The kids just couldn't understand that there would be someone out there who needed those things, and whose mommy and daddy couldn't just buy them.  In the end, they came around to it, and got excited picking out things for her.

We went to Costco to buy her a winter coat, but first had to stop for pizza and hot dogs at 10:30 am.

 Then the stress got to them.  Asher couldn't stand to be in the cart or walk, so he went through Costco like this:

 Here are some of the items we picked out for our angel: Coat, hat & gloves, pajamas, slippers, a reindeer necklace (Asher's special pick), underwear, socks, sneakers, several outfits.

 We also received a donated pair of brand new snow boats, and picked out some small toys at 5 Below.  Asher chose a rainbow unicorn beanie baby, and Benjamin chose Frozen-themed nail polish.  I ordered her a gum ball coin bank from Amazon and gum ball refills.  I really hope that she loves everything.

Sunday night began Hanukkah, and we hosted my parents and aunt Jane and uncle Ed here for dinner and candle lighting.  The kids were SO excited.

Monday, Charlotte and I had a whirlwind day but managed to squeeze in a visit to the Please Touch Museum.  Here she is curled up in a baby doll's crib! She insisted she fit.

 Monday night, we went to a friend's house for dinner, candles, and a gift exchange.  We got a little extra excitement when Charlotte pooped in her underwear and needed a bath and full outfit change.  A year and a half ago, Benjamin did the same thing there! I told my friend there must be something special in her house...

 Wednesday night, Eric and the kids went to another friend's house for Hanukkah and dreidel.  I was at work, but came at the end, completely hungry, grumpy, and anti-social.  I felt much better after I ate, but I was not a very nice person before that.

Thursday night, we had Hanukkah at yet another friend's house!  This was at our next door neighbor's house, and the kids made a gingerbread Hanukkah house, which they decorated, and then ripped apart and devoured.

Hanukkah house decorating

 We lit the candles together and I gave the kids each a package of 20 shopkins. What happiness that gave them!

Friday I ran the bake sale at Charlotte's school. In addition, it was her Hanukkah show.  There has been a lot of attrition in Hanukkah show attendance over the years, since her brothers continually failed to perform.  This year, NO ONE but me came to see Charlotte.  And you know what? She was great!  Smiling, dancing, and knew the words.  Maybe next year the family will turn out.

Charlotte in her Hanukkah hat- she is a pink candle

 We got back Charlotte's school photos, and she is beyond adorable. I could eat that sweet face!  Her sassy pose is not actually a pose, but artful cropping done by the photographer- I heard from numerous reliable sources that she would give a perfect smile and pull her dress up simultaneously.  This clever crop just hides her belly and underwear.

 On Saturday we drove up to Newton, MA for my cousin's daughter's bat mitzvah.  We stay in hotels so infrequently that the kids think it is the greatest adventure on Earth.  We packed our swim suits and played in the hotel pool, we walked across the street to Walgreen's, and then went to the Hanukkah party at my cousin's house.  (If you are counting, there are 8 nights of Hanukkah and we have spent every one of them with family or friends.)  My cousin's wife had thoughtfully bought gifts for all of the kids, and they were thrilled!  There was soda, sparkling cider, and Hanukkah gelt everywhere, so they all had sugar for dinner and were happy as could be.

 Charlotte was upstairs playing with some older girls, and Asher came to tell me that she was getting wet- My cousin's daughter had set her up with a bunch of barbies and a small plastic pool.  Charlotte was very enthusiastic with their swimming, and had made a huge mess on the (newly refinished hardwood) floor.  She was already soaked, so rather than end her happy fun, I stuck her in the bathtub.  Girl loved the barbies!

"Look, Mama! I get this one wet, her hair turns PINK!"

I had cleverly packed a full diaper bag before leaving Philadelphia, but then put the diaper bag in the hotel room and left it there. So when she needed a full outfit change, which I had in the diaper bag, I had nothing.  She ended the evening in her cousin's size 6 underwear, big tank top, and a tutu skirt.

Today was the bat mitzvah, which was lovely, but long for the kids.  They played outside, watched Netflix, and made bead necklaces.  Finally, it was lunch and party time!

Waiting for the service to end

 I was so excited for the kids to go to their first bat mitzvah.  They loved the music, the socks for dancing, and the photo booth. Oh, and the dessert! And the hot chocolate bar!  We left around 2 and I drove us home at a very speedy pace. We made 1 brief stop for a potty break and that was it- I shaved 30 minutes off of what was predicted to be a 5 hour and 30 minute drive.  As Eric said, I drive like my father.

Charlotte dancing with my uncle Richard. She LOVES him.

At home, we had a quick dinner and then celebrated the 8th night of Hanukkah. The kids loved their final gifts- I got Benjamin a dry erase board and he immediately drew a picture of himself with Daddy at the beach. Asher got an electronic safe with a code from Meema and Papa Nick, and he has already stored his most valuable treasures in there.  He has shared the code with Benjamin, Daddy, and me- but Charlotte is never allowed to know it.