Sunday, November 19, 2017

2nd grade conferences

Eric and I attended conferences with the boys' teachers on Friday.

First we met with Benjamin's teacher.  We have been in regular contact with her- Benjamin's adjustment to 2nd grade was somewhat better than his adjustment to 1st, but we have come upon several recurring problems: Benjamin's social skills are lacking; Benjamin has trouble paying attention in class; Benjamin's effort in his schoolwork is inconsistent.  The good news is that he is academically ahead of the game- he is on par with, or ahead of, his peers in every area. His reading and writing are excellent, and the teacher thinks he is very bright. His trouble with attention and focus are holding him back. 

We are in the process of having him evaluated by the school psychologist. My guess is that he meets criteria for a diagnosis of ADHD, but we will wait to find out. As much as I hate the idea of "labeling," it will give us some guidelines for how to address the struggles we are having. We're fortunate this year that his teacher is patient, kind, and consistent. She has been hugely supportive as we navigate the process.  I have struggled myself with all of this, wondering what I could have done differently for us to get a different outcome; normalizing what is happening by saying that all 7 year-old boys are kind of like this; minimizing my fears and then moments later exaggerating them (it doesn't take much for me to get to a point where this diagnosis will doom him forever).  The team at school who I met with, which was the counselor, achievement team head, psychologist, and speech and language therapist, all have the same goal: for Benjamin to love school, love learning, and be happy. In the end, that sweet boy is still my son, and I love and adore him, and only want him to be happy.  I am hopeful we are on that path.

Asher's teacher had many wonderful things to say about him: he is a good and quick learner, shows consistent effort in his work, has neat handwriting, and is a good citizen in the class. The only negative he had was that sometimes Asher overshares and doesn't know when to stop talking. I cannot imagine where he gets that trait from...

Asher's teacher also told us that Asher has some excellent leadership qualities and might be a natural leader.  How wonderful to hear! Later Eric says, "Gee, that sure was a nice way to tell us our son is bossy."  Hopefully Asher can use his charm and social prowess to turn "bossy" into "leader."

Overall, I left the conferences feeling elated at how the boys are doing. I am thrilled that they are successful 2nd graders, and love that they still love learning.  I hope it continues for a lifetime.

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