|Smiling after the fear had passed|
|Asher on the bed, Benjamin beside him, and Daddy Eric coming through the wall|
|Benjamin mid-bed flop|
So I said, "Something's wrong, let's go to the hospital!" On the way to the hospital, I decided that he had suffered some serious injury and was paralyzed. Unfortunately, I am not kidding and I actually am that crazy. He wasn't moving his legs, or his arms. When he was still, he wasn't crying, and actually fell asleep in the car.
I was losing it, asking Eric and my mother-in-law if they thought that he was paralyzed, and I started playing through scenarios in my head about how we would take care of him if he were paralyzed, and all kinds of terrible, awful things. After about the 10th time I asked, I think Eric was ready to punch me.
At the hospital, I rushed in and stood there, panicking while other people registered. When I told the woman at the desk what was wrong, I said I was worried because he wasn't moving his legs or his arm. Well! Apparently that is the way to get immediate attention at the ER! I swear I never said "paralyzed" to them, but obviously the implication was bad enough. We got a room, and nurses right away. Eric took Asher and my mother-in-law home. Benjamin stayed snuggled on my lap the whole time, and was quiet unless anyone touched him.
It became apparent that he was only having trouble with his left arm. I put some music on, and he was bouncing both legs to the music, and tapping my arm with his right hand. Benjamin got his arm x-rayed, and he just screamed! It was heartbreaking for me. I held his hands and kissed his head. He looked so small on the big x-ray table, and so vulnerable.
I started to suspect that maybe it was just his elbow out of the socket. That happened to me all the time when I was little. Benjamin only cried when someone moved his arm, and then was quiet when he was still. I asked the x-ray tech if that might be it, and she said that often when that happens, it will pop back in when it's manipulated for the x-ray. And wouldn't you know, just a few minutes after the x-ray, Benjamin perked right up and started moving his left arm, and even putting weight on it. What a relief! I went out to the nurses and told them that he seemed fine, and they got us on our way shortly after that.
It was exhausting to worry so much about him (even if a lot of the worry was self-inflicted). I just feel lucky that it wasn't anything serious, and that we got such prompt treatment. I hope we don't have to go back anytime soon, either!