Ha! 36 weeks!!!!!

Well, we did it!  We made it to 36 weeks, which is considered full-term for my sweet little boys.  Hurray!  I am so proud of myself, and of course thankful for all the help I got from Eric, our families, and our friends as we went through 12 weeks of bedrest.  It was all completely worth it!  I am ready to have these babies, and barring any disasters, we will be able to bring them home from the hospital with us.  What a huge relief!

Today we had a non-stress test and our last ultrasound.  The non-stress test was completely uneventful, the babies did their usual performance and I didn't contract.  While I was lying there, my OB stopped in to say hello.  He asked if I wanted an internal this week, and I said no.  He said he thinks I am probably dilated.  Well, great, but if I'm not in labor and my water hasn't broken, who cares?  Then he pulled out his Blackberry and looked at his calendar and told me if I didn't go into labor, they would want to induce me sometime during the week of April 5.  And then left!  No actual date, no talk about the process...

I know it is silly, but I had really been hoping for some kind of pat on the back, some kind of comment that here we were, 36 weeks, after he hospitalized me at 27 weeks saying, "just get to 30, ok?"  But nothing!  I made some kind of comment, and he said, "Well, the babies are actually putting less pressure on your cervix now because they're bigger."  Ok, thanks.  I am not 100% sure how that makes sense.  Maybe now that A's head is bigger it won't simply slip out of my vagina but will instead have to be pushed? 

Later he came in at the end of my growth scan.  The growth scan showed that the babies have continued to grow (A is estimated at about 5.5 lbs, and B is about 5 lbs), and all their parts are continuing to function perfectly.  They are both using their lungs in there, which is great to see, since they are going to need those lungs once they are on the outside.  Fluid levels are also good.  They are all cramped in there, it really looks like a tight squeeze!  B's feet are all the way up under my breasts.  I knew this because he often kicks the underwire on my bra, but it was funny having the woman put the ultrasound sensor up so high trying to get a measurement of his leg.  At this point, I feel like baby measurements must be such a rough estimate, I can see that all their pieces are totally squeezed and the ultrasound tech is only getting vague pictures to measure.  So different from 20 weeks when they were swimming around with all the room they needed!

Anyway, my OB came in and so I fortunately got a chance to ask some more questions.  He said that he won't be delivering the week of April 5th, so if I need to be induced, the other OB in the practice (who I have seen, and like, but have not seen since 28 weeks) will do it.  So my OB didn't want to talk about induction and told me to make an appointment with the other OB to discuss the induction.  I also told him that I am planning to have a doula at the birth.  He said that was fine if that was what I wanted, but that in his opinion, we didn't need one.  He said that he thought doulas interfered and took away from the father's participation in the birth.

The doula we're planning to have is an old family friend, and I don't think that she will interfere.  In fact, when we last met with her, she said she would not tell us what to do during the labor, but would be there to offer support.  I am not worried about her interfering, and when we met with her, both Eric and my mom felt like they definitely wanted her around for the birth.

Overall, I kind of felt like my OB took the wind out of my sails.  I hate to feel that way, I shouldn't feel any less happy with our progress and accomplishments, or any less excited about the fact that I have two perfect, healthy boys wiggling away in my belly. And I don't, I just wish that my OB had reflected back some of that excitement to me (oh my god, what a therapist thing to say!).  It felt like getting twin pregnancies to 36 weeks happens all the time for him, so no big deal.  This kind of laid-back style worked well when I was panicking over my cervix, because it felt like, yes, cervixes shorten but we'll make it, no big deal.  It was calming and reassuring.  But now that I am excited, I want that from him and apparently that isn't in his repertoire. 

I contrast this with my fertility doctor, who gets hundreds of women pregnant every year, but still seemed overjoyed to see me healthy and pregnant.  In a way, I am hoping the other OB does my delivery, because he does tend to be a little more upbeat and positive at times, and if I need cheering on through the pushing, he might be more likely to give it.

Oh, and my other complaint is that no one ever called me with the results of my Group B Strep test.  It is negative, which is nice (although even if it were positive it would really not be a huge deal).  But no one called.  I ended up asking the nurse who does the non-stress tests if she could peek in my chart and tell me.

In the end, obviously my happiness and excitement outweigh the disappointment in my OB.  I have, for the most part, gotten excellent care from my OB and am so lucky that we got constant attention for weeks and weeks to reassure me that all was well with my babies.  And I am now overjoyed that we can happily wait for my labor to start, and when it does, we can leave for the hospital and look forward to coming home as a family.  I packed my post-labor hospital bag, with a coming home outfit for me (maternity pants, a nursing tank, and a sweater) and the boys' coming home outfits.  I chose for the boys these adorable blue and white onesies that my mom bought them in Paris.  They have bunnies on the front, and the bunnies have a small white button as their tails.  I just know the boys will be so cute that I could eat them up!